Birth order – can it affect your life?

The experts say differently – it all hinges on whether you were the first born, the middle or the baby. It seems your birth order can play a very important part in your development. Much of it depends upon how much attention you receive from your parents and how well you relate with your brothers or sisters.

The first born gets all of the attention and has her parents to herself, that is until the second comes along. After that it is up to her to hold on to what she had before. The second baby will never have her parents to herself, she will always share with the firstborn. The more children that come along, the more they will have to learn to share until the arrival of the last one, the youngest is usually doted upon by everyone.

The birth order can have a very big effect on your life, how well you adapt to and learn from these situations will be your guidelines for dealing with situations the rest of your life.

Psychologists researching the impact of birth order on personality have discovered that firstborns tend to be highly motivated and high achievers. Here is a good example: of the first 23 astronauts sent into outer space, 21 of them were either firstborns or only children.

Firstborns identify more readily with their parents and with power and authority, than later children do. They are usually more assertive, socially dominant and more ambitious. In school, first children generally work harder and do better than the brothers and sisters who follow. They can grow to be more competitive and to have higher career ambitions.

Middle children (whether in the middle of three kids or nine) generally become good mediators and are good at getting on with people. They don’t have the superior strength and knowledge of older kids, nor do they receive the extra bit of love and affection that the last siblings in the nest receive. Instead they need to get on with everyone in order to get noticed and to negotiate what they want. They learn about soothing feathers, sorting things out and relating with people. According to the experts, they make very good managers and leaders because of these skills of flexibility and diplomacy that they learn early in life.

The youngest child is often outgoing and good at motivating people. Because they come at the end of the family, they are often confident and affectionate. Because they don’t have the same pressure to please their parents that the firstborns had, they may be risk takers. The youngest children may, however, be quite competitive and determined to do as well or better than their older siblings, although they may purposely pursue different fields to avoid direct competition. They’re also more likely to question authority.

So does one of the above sound like you? Maybe you have more in common with people who were born at the same birth order than you do with your own family.

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